Understanding the word "Mature"

Today is what I call "a day of thought," as if my other days are thought-free or in some distinct way different from today itself. I like to ramble what can I say? If you follow my blogs, I suggest you read them slowly and at your own pace, probably while sipping on your fresh roast coffee or your fancy mocha latte with little foam. Or maybe you're at home, bored and trying to find something constructive to do or at work, sitting task less and wanting something to read. Whatever the situation, I want you to take what I say as an opinion never as a fact unless I state otherwise. 

When I became a teacher I never expected to be called a "hero." The other day, I somehow hit a low point where my self-esteem dropped and my motivation flew somewhere out the window. I was consoled by my husband who wrapped around his arms around me and reminded me of who I was. He said, "You're a hero everyday to those kids. You are the one who listens, objects and defines them as individuals and teach them how important it is to be themselves and think positively. They are never a number to you, they are thinkers and dreamers, just waiting for you to show them how to open their minds and grow." I must say that those words never hit as hard as they did that day and for that I thank my wonderful husband for all of his support and love in both my personal life and professional career. 

Having shared that, I thought a lot today about a letter sent to me on campus. The letter reads as follows:

"Dear Ms. I-don't-give-a-shit-who-I-offend,

Over the last few years I've come into contact with many students of yours, praising that your teaching style is unlike any other professor at the school. Being somewhat curious and intrigued by all the hype found myself registering for one of your, always filled to capacity, lecture classes. I remember the first day, being put into an uncomfortable situation, having to decide whether to sit with a group of students of my race or with a group of students of my sex. I completed your "test" as asked and learned nothing but decided to not drop out for the seemingly popularity of your teaching techniques. Before long I had fallen into the clutches of your obscene, immature, and disrespectful classroom etiquette. After failing your class with a very unexpected and unappreciated "D" I promised myself I would never recommend you as a teacher or allow anyone I cared about to enter the derogatory classroom of such a close minded and rude member of the faculty. Needless to say, I learned nothing and I could have gotten my normal "A" from a professor who knew how to teach properly and not expect to brainwash her students into believing the things she does. I'm not writing this to make a point, I am merely writing it to vent. Isn't that what you always asked us to do? You say you are just like we are but you're not. You are simply a sad excuse of a human being who thinks that the world revolves around you and only your opinions matter. I'm graduating this term and will take with me, the fond memory of a course that rings garbage in my mind as I show you what maturity is all about.

Sincerely, a disappointed student"

Now, I sit here writing my letter in return, knowing that the sender was anonymous, to assure myself I said what I needed to. I guess my understanding of certain things are questioned but I'll promise you this, I will always love what I do, no matter who tries to bring me down. Enjoy my response....

"Dear Mr/Mrs. Obscurity,

In response to your hypocritical bashing of my teaching techniques, I want to thank you for your honesty. If there is one thing I always tell my students, it is that honesty is something that is vital in any relationship, whether it be through friends, lovers, or students and teachers. It is one of those things that has yet to catch on or even generate a better understanding so communication can follow. Your bold words and choice of comparisons are one to question in my praised teaching efforts. I'm very glad you gave into peer pressure and took my class expected something different and fun rather than with the expectation to actually learn something. I don't ask students to enroll for the sake of enjoyment, I don't ask them to enroll even, I am merely here to do what I love to do and that is to teach. Whether it is an English class, a Humanities class, a Writing class, a Lecture session, or a Q&A, I always tell my students the same thing. "If you don't like my class or me, please come talk to me so we figure something out." Needless to say, your fair attempt to stay in my class effected you negatively and I wish you had spoken to me during the time you were in my roster, of your discontent and unapproved thoughts of the lessons I put forward. If only your assertiveness was brought to my attention at that time instead of however long for me to receive this letter. In regards to your "test" opinion, I never refer to my lesson plans as tests, that term came from students talking and for some reason deciding that I, myself was testing the patience of everyone and pushing the barriers to basic education. What I portray in my lessons are not meant to test anything, except maybe logical thinking, an open mind, and basic humanity. I doubt you wrote this letter not having one mixed emotion locked away behind the anger you held in for so long about your experience in that class. Did it offend you so badly that you had to step forward and make your voice clear or did it bother you to realize you were hateful in your thoughts upon entering that room and knowing you were one of the people whose racist, prejudiced and sexist mind, made you the stereotypical asshole. It's safe to say, you learned something. Whether or not you come to terms with your personal issues, doesn't phase me but I hope you figured out who you were and how to make yourself a better person. Hell, you had a lot of courage writing this didn't you? Would you have done that before my class? Perhaps, you are the one who will belittle others for your own happiness and walk on the "little people" who got in your way. I don't give out grades in my classroom, I give out feedback, you take your grade. My guess is that without an A, you probably deserved a D, so don't blame me for not teaching you to your standards, hold your finger pointing to the one responsible for whatever failed attempts you tried so hard to accomplish. You're not writing this to make a point, yet your venting seems a bit unpracticed.You sit and judge me as if no one is judging you. Prepare yourself for a lifetime of sad human beings like myself who try very hard to make a difference in your life and make it easy for you to be somebody. My opinions only matter to those who want to hear them. Congratulations on your graduation and I'm very sad you learned nothing from me. Thank you, also for letting me know that what I taught was garbage and that I'm the most rude, ignorant and immature professor to ever complete a career at your university. I have to admit however, it takes a great level of maturity to write such a degrading letter to a member of the saddened faculty and not have enough pride to announce your identity. 

My kindest wishes,

Your Teacher"

Can a Kindle really replace books?

I'm not sure what the creative minds behind the new Kindle were thinking when they released another Internet enabled device that continues to push us to computer dependency. Isn't enough that our students are engulfed by video game consoles, cell phone apps and social networking sites? Why must we take away the whole purpose of a simple, yet poignant piece of our lives just to make it more "accessible" to people in the current time. I don't find it accessible at all, more like an excuse for laziness and an encouragement for lack of motivation. People no longer have to pick up a book or rely on sources like libraries to find literature when they can sit at home and download content that can be viewed without having to hold a 400+ page novel or break a nail to flip pages. I don't discourage modernization and growing with our technological advances but when you take away something so dear to me and offer a new and improved replacement, I'm going to have a lot to say. I grew up with books; the old, dust covered, hard bound books that had lettering printed from a type-writer and illustrated with a black and white press. My mother would sit with me for hours reading stories from these big and bulky books just so I can use my imagination and picture it all in my head. Literature quickly became one of my biggest passions and by the time I had graduated middle school, I had memorized all of Edgar Allan Poe's  and Emily Dickinson's works and persuaded others to follow in my love for the authors of our world. Soon I found myself taken over by Shakespeare, Mark Twain, Charles Dickens, John Steinbeck, Harper Lee and Ken Kesey. I was taken in by these great authors and was influenced by their stories in many different ways, most of which motivated me to become the English teacher I am today. In any case, the opposing side would argue that this computer-like device offers the same material and does not diminish any of its original content. Isn't that diminishing something though? Taking away the joy of opening the cover for the first time, being able to read the first words of that author in print while holding the book in your own hands? Shouldn't you feel that rush of turning the page and seeing what happens next, realizing that every emotion, every thought, all the blood and sweat unfolding in some strange irony, all the way from the author himself down to the very last set of hands at the publishing company; has in someway become apart of you? Maybe I'm being over dramatic, or perhaps I'm just so one-sided I cannot see the good in holding up a digital pad and being able to read an author's whole life's work with just a click of a scroll. The Kindle will never take the place of books in my classroom and as far as I'm concerned, it doesn't exist.